Wheel of Time

It was her first bicycle. She didn't even know how to ride one but that couldn't take away the joy she felt in owning it.

It wasn't difficult to fall in love with the suave blue beauty that added speed to the experience of being a nature's spectator. She had never before felt wind on her face. She loved it so much that we would jump at every opportunity for experiencing it again. Competition with her little companions, getting bread and eggs from market early morning or curd when sun was at its peak. Everything was so much fun...And then she outgrew it one day.

There was no point buying another one. She could rather go for car in sometime now, she was told. She agreed being anyway busy with other 'first' things in life. But there was an unfinished desire to live that experience a tad more. That desire still lives in her.

There are several such longings you keep curbing giving some justification or none. You are helpless sometimes and learn to seed those desires in some corner of your heart hoping you'd forget about them some day.

And suddenly one day you get an opportunity out of nowhere, to just go for it. And you feel complete somewhere...She too got a chance today. She felt that joy. Her friend brought a new cycle for himself. She had time, a cycle and open space to feel wind on her face just as she did many moons ago.

It's not so much about having to ride a cycle again but about letting out those seeds. Waking up those desires and making them come alive. It's then when you feel a sense of achievement and joy that has no substitute.

The Mumbai I Know

I met Mumbai in September last year for a very brief time. About a week. I admired her from the very moment I saw her. It was 6:15 am when my eyes were still drowsy. But there she was - bubbly, zesty, vivacious...so full of life. It would be an interesting tryst, I was sure right then. I couldn't have been wrong. I am yet to meet to someone who'd have disliked her after being with her for sometime.
I decided there itself that I'll call her 'she'. She has to be a woman to be so nurturing and giving. Plus she is so beautiful and charming. But 'vulnerable'? That is not a trait I associated with her then. I still don't. Perhaps they did. Surprised how her charisma did not lure them.


I had work in the building exactly opposite the VT station. And wasn't I as fascinated to see VT as Bollywood shows people, with big dreams who come to Mumbai, are? More than fascinated, I'd say. Several movies would be made now, featuring the station albeit in a different light.
The memory of a couple of hours I spent in Leopold Cafe is quite crisp in my heart. It was my friend, a former Mumbaiker's suggestion to go there. "Your trip would not be complete unless you go there. You have to see it to believe it," were somewhat her words. And I couldn't thank her enough. Though I do not generally like noisy places, this space was different. "The music here is very loud usually," shouted my friend. I could barely hear her. I get shivers thinking that a year later, one night the silence would more deafening than the music they usually play.
Gateway of India is a few steps away. It was about 11 pm and we walked. I can still feel the mischief in air saying that it was about to bring some shower. The monument, I must say, looked very graceful that rainy night. And then I saw another iconic building - The Taj Mahal Hotel. As I write, I can just think of a white building with red top and rising black smoke...
So I just close my eyes and think about the beauty I have great admiration for. And I see... the promenade beside the majestic Queen's Necklace (or Marine Drive), my guest house at NepeanSea Road, Bhel Puri at Chowpatty, talkative waves at Worli, rocks at Bandra beach, cheerful people enjoying Jumbo King vada pav, bargaining for a trendy t-shirt at Fashion Street...I see a modest Haji Ali standing beautifully in Worli waters, some immodest people pushing you in Zaveri Bazaar and a crowd dancing away to glory in lighted streets (celebrating Ganesh Chaturthi)...Her beauty is apparent in everything she is made of.

I wonder if little Moshe Holtzberg would ever think of her like that.

A walk to remember

It's the perfect weather to enjoy a long tiring walk. Roads are clear...so is the sky. The breeze is fragrant or is it my hair that are silky today cause they were washed today? There is relatively less traffic -- it's a Saturday. So no auto/bus/bike/car, I go back home walking today.

The service lane is too narrow to make space for arrogant gigantic cars, mischievous motorbikes, reckless college students and lost souls like me too. Others mights still accommodate, wanderers like me should have separate boulevards. Anyway. Have to bear with this rush only for about a kilometer before i find some peac..."kahan jaana hai madam" - the considerate autowallah.

Nowhere. Seriously. Let me be, please. I see a familiar face approaching. I choose to ignore and pretend I din't see. I wouldn't want anyone to accompany me unless it was you. But you ruthless bugger. You are a bigger dreamer than I am. You'd not like to leave those stars and walk with me on paths that I choose. One day you will. Till then I see my feet taking me one step closer to the beauty of everything around.

The flowers here aren't very pretty but look aesthetic, juxtaposed against dark n light green leaves. The man sleeping under the tree must be a day labourer who just gave up after struggling through a long day. Or may be a useless unemployed soul who drank too much. Must be fun sleeping like that.

I sense a very eerie pride in some cars that speed by - the red Esteem, brown Pajero, blue Suzuki, off-white Corolla and black Skoda. Cycles are innocent but have low IQ, it seems. Go berserk anytime. Bikes are bikes - dreamers like me. And pedestrians are irritants as most of them are walking to reach somewhere, therefore, missing to see how happy trees on the way are; to hear the call of wind; to feel the grief of the big monument that stands unnoticed or under-noticed.

Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe said, "The soul that sees beauty may sometimes walk alone. "

Awesome Mausam!

And again Delhi wakes up to a rainy morning. Dark sky, roads full of water, cool breeze, traffic jams, some frowned foreheads but mostly cheerful eyes...in all another beautiful day...that too in the month of May. Couldn't have asked for anything better!

After savouring a hot cup of sweet tea, prepared by dad, I stare at my wardrobe for good 10-15 mins. I pick up the attire I like the most...a loose kurta, churidar and a dupatta. All set I step out feeling positivity all around me. I stop the auto a little far from my destination so that I can enjoy a short walk with music accompanying me of course.

I feel so confident, so positive and so light! On my way I admire the green leaves dancing on trees, yellow flowers making the environment vibrant, roads that look cleaner and darker after being washed away by the rain, cars that pass by splashing dirty water on my favourite dress....i do not mind anything today! Nothing can go wrong today....It is a happy blissful rainy day!

Happy Living and a wonderful day :)

Music to ears

Destinations do not fascinate me. Journeys do. Traveling is anytime better than 'arriving'.

These thoughts in mind and headphones in my ear are often my companion on my way to work. Most of the time I wish I could just travel and reach nowhere. Alas that is just a wish. Being aware that arriving is important (and inevitable in most cases) I try to make most of each minute I walk towards my destination. It's easy for me as I reach another destination on my route to the physical one.

The transformation to the other world is absolute. No wonder I can never remember directions and routes. I am never there. (This calls for another blog entry, which I think should discourage people from asking me to be aware of directions)

It takes almost 25 minutes and Rs 50 to reach my office by an auto-rickshaw. Traveling by bus is lot cheaper and better as it takes more time but the scorching heat forces me to shell out extra bucks and compromise on extra time. Getting into a rickshaw and putting on earphones and a scarf is almost mechanical now. Earphones connect me to music that takes me into the world of my own and the scarf protects me from killer pollution and some stares that intervene my thought process.

I think music is a very significant part of what I call a good journey. Good numbers - English or Hindi - always lift my spirits no matter how distressed I have been. While a 'dil dance maare' amuses me, 'It must have been love' brings back some past memories. There are songs which help taking a leap into some future event.

A wedding song invariably puts me to imagining what it'd be like when my elder sis would be dressed as a bride. What follows comes to an end only when I am forced to come back as I reach the office gate.

Some days are lucky when radio channels play songs other than the ones that are 'hit' these days. Those bring back memories of some wonderful days that are always worth recalling. For instance, 'Jaadu hai nasha hai' from the movie Jism takes me back to 2002 when I used to admire a cute guy in tuition classes. The thought brings a smile even when everything around looks quite grim.

Incidentally, my notion of having two left feet was disillusioned recently at a party where I was complimented for being a good dancer. Before that I used to dream of some flexi moves and grooves during such journeys. I continue to do so except I feel dancing is no longer just my dream world's prerogative. It is no longer in the list of things I do just for me.

So, a 'Hips don't lie' now brings in the party animal in me which I thougt never existed.

I am not sure if this post really makes sense or conveys what I want to say. "Waiting on the world to change" by John Mayer playing on radio right now.....